Children of adult trauma survivors have unique lives. They do not grow up in the same environment as many kids, but that does not need to be a negative thing. As adults who are struggling through dissociative identity disorder and/or p.t.s.d., we have an overwhelming amount of “stuff” to work through on a daily basis. But our children do as well. They need to be loved and nurtured so that they don’t endure neglect the way we did as children.

There are many ways that we can help our children cope with our mental disorders. These ideas don’t even have to take much energy, because we often don’t have much extra energy to give! Our spouses or significant others can be a huge help in this area as well, especially if they are sensitive to our situation and proactive in helping everyone to grow and work together within the home.

1. Keep the lines of communication open between you and your children.

Talk, talk, and talk some more to your kids. This has been a hard one for me, not because I’m afraid to speak openly with my children, but because I’m such an introvert that I get physically exhausted with speaking excessively. That’s where my husband comes in. He can communicate all day with them. In the moments when your P.T.S.D. or D.I.D. come up, be candid with how you’re feeling or what you’re up against. Show your children that life is not all roses, but then help them to see that you are still moving forward. When they notice that you’re walking through a battle and yet continuously putting one foot in front of another to carry on, they will learn and grow. Continue reading “10 Ways to Help Your Kids Cope With Your P.T.S.D. or Dissociative Identity Disorder”

My husband loves to draw comics. He has filled journals with all kinds of funny, creepy, and contemplative animations. As a family living with Dissociative Identity Disorder in our home, we need to keep the humor going. Life can be filled with way too much stress at any given moment, so making light of the funny things that happen with D.I.D. really helps.

Communication can be as simple as leaving a sweet or funny picture when you’re a gifted artist. Unfortunately, I can’t even draw a stick figure. But that’s alright, because I have his amazing talent at my disposal!

Below are some comics that were drawn up to explain a day-in-the-life of a person with dissociative identity disorder. They are meant to be funny, not to attack the difficulty of living with this illness.

Humor in the D.I.D.’s Closet

 

We have a lot of different tastes, that’s for sure! I want my little girl ruffle dresses and my black leather jacket, chains, and Harley Davidson boots at the same time. My attitude about clothes and style can easily change three times a day. Continue reading “Dissociative Identity Disorder Humor, You’ve Got To Keep Laughing”

Psalm 72:12-14,  “For He delivers the needy when He calls, the poor and him who has no helper. He has pity on the weak and the needy, and saves the lives of the needy. From oppression and violence He redeems their life, and precious is their blood in His sight.”

My life was supposed to be at an extremely exciting turning point. We had just relocated to Europe as missionaries, and I was so excited about what God had in store for us. I felt as if I had arrived at a new level of maturity. I had passed our training process for missions and given the “you’re ready!” from our church family and our mission. It felt wonderful. I was a young mother, wrapping up many years of difficult pregnancies, and looking forward to a fresh start in a foreign land. Continue reading “Renewal In The Darkness For Trauma Survivors”

I have been a church attendee almost all of my life. As an adult, I have been a missionary wife, living oversees, as well as a pastor’s wife. I have also had dissociative identity disorder since very early childhood. Unfortunately, having this disorder and being a church-going Christian does not go hand in hand. For the most part, the church is either unaware of dissociative identity disorder, or has obscure misconceptions of what this condition is all about. Continue reading “What I Wish The Church Understood About Dissociative Identity Disorder”

“Do not worry if you have built your castles in the air. They are where they should be. Now put the foundations under them.”    Henry David Thoreau

My last post left me in a mire of self-pity.  My life is hard, as is yours, but we have to find little joys in the midst of the discouragement. Ritual abuse survivors are very creative people. We have to be in order to have split off as children and withstood the trauma that we endured. Continue reading “Little Joys”

This quote rings out so true to me on so many levels. People who have experienced ritual abuse or trafficking have not had a lot of great experiences in their lives. For the most part, we have survived from one crisis to another with a few breaths in between, trying to recover just enough to cope with the next inevitable traumatic event. We live in a fight or flight mode, putting our bodies and minds into a constant shock pattern of never being able to just relax and enjoy a moment, a friend, a connection, a little blessing. Continue reading “A Pessimistic Perspective”

Every time I begin the process of writing I panic. It wells up inside of me and feels just like this picture, like a silent scream that wants to be let out, but there’s no where for it to go to calm down. The panic remains. If I don’t write, I can pretend that my life hasn’t been what it has. But as soon as pen goes to paper, the horror of my reality sets in, and I once again have to face the knowledge of my bitter existence. Continue reading “God’s Sovereignty in the Crazy”

For years I have lived in the dark, in a secret space in my head that I long for people to see, but have been afraid to expose to the world. I have rationalized staying quiet about my journey by assuming that others will not understand or be able to grasp my story. It’s just too harsh, too grave, too scary, to comprehend.

Continue reading “Truth Unveiled”